“The BUTT trap”
I want to get in shape, but…
I should eat better, but…
I should workout, but…
All these statements are what I call the BUTT trap. Listen, it is really easy to talk yourself out of what you should do or what you want to do,you can always find a BUT. However, here is the danger of always finding a but… if you always have a but… you will stay on your BUTT!!!
Drop the but…. and get off yours!!!
“I want it all and I want it now”
Americans are the worst we want it super-sized, we want it in pill form, and we want it yesterday. However, the truth is, when it comes to working out: super-sized, pill form, and wanting it done yesterday, don’t work. If getting fit really came in pill form or could happen overnight, everyone would do it.
If you are currently out of shape, it took you a long time to get there. It takes a long time to form habits, bad ones and good ones. Rather than expecting overnight success through one quick fix or another, keep things in perspective. Set yourself up for success by realizing that getting fit will take time and it will take work, but you can do it.
Enjoy each workout. Enjoy each small change. Enjoy every bit of your energy and your life. Keep enjoying these things, and you will keep motivated. Focus on the feeling better part of fitness, learn to love the journey rather than only living for the destination. In truth, you ultimately want fitness to become a part of your life and a part of who you are, rather than a distant image which you are running towards on the treadmill.
“I am on a diet”
Going back to my last point. If you are on a diet, eventually you will be off a diet. Diets are good foods and bad foods. Diets either succeed or fail. Diets are a black or white decision. Diets are a right or wrong answer. Diets are a good or bad person.
Do I sound flawed in my logic? Diets aren’t a good or bad person… Okay well then why do we feel guilty when we “cheat on our diet”? We cheat on things in our life that are considered morally wrong, cheating on spouses, cheating on tests, cheating in sports… the list goes on. So then, how can you cheat on a diet? You can cheat on a diet only if you place a judgment on it. I feel so guilty for “cheating on my diet.” This is a bad food, so I am a bad person for eating it. Oh, I feel so guilty about eating this bad food and because I failed on my diet. I am a bad person for not being “perfect”. Since I’m not perfect, I quit!
Slow down, take a breath, relax, and instead make a permanent change. Change your lifestyle. Instead of changing what you are doing, change what you do. A lifestyle is a part of you, an overall way that you do things. You choose to eat better because you feel better. When you choose to indulge, INDULGE. Do not feel guilty about it. Satisfy your craving, then get back to normal. It is not about “bad foods” and “good foods;” a lifestyle is about being a little bit better each day.
Fitness: “It’s all or nothing baby!!!!”
Why do diets fail, why do we get burnt out, why do we give up, why do we quit…. Why, because perfection is impossible to maintain and most people make eating and exercise an all or nothing experience. I am either dieting or not dieting. I go to the gym for 2 hours or I don’t go at all. I am a “workout” person or I am not.
Yikes, no one is perfect all the time. I am not perfect all the time and I consider myself a “workout person.” The trick is finding a balance. If I can’t …. Then I will be a little bit better about…. If I can’t workout today, I will be a little bit better about my eating. If there is no gym near me, I will go for a walk. If I have a couple of glasses of wine, I will do an extra 30 minutes of cardio this week. The way I think about it… your goals are long term, in the short term you are going to have good days and bad days, good meals and bad meals, what we want to do is minimize the difference between the good days and the bad days. I promise, the closer you start getting to your goal, the better you start feeling, the higher your motivation, the less likely you will be to be worried about the tiny bumps in the road.
You may be wondering… what are wishy washy wishy? Well, it’s something like… “I just want to be in better shape”. While I am sure this really is a wish, there is nothing concrete here. You really haven’t set a goal. It is so easy to get lost, frustrated, and eventually quit when there is no real end in sight.
Here’s the thing, a wish is a vague idea… and it is a first step… to get what you want, you have to get specific.
Once you have your wish, then you can define your goal, determine your level of success. You answer your personal question… what does it mean to be in better shape?
Obviously, one way to measure fitness goals is in inches and pounds. However, do not limit yourself… Being in better shape can also mean: I want to have more energy to play with my wonderful dogs, I want to have more stamina to be able to keep up with my child and play soccer, I want to lose a notch on my belt, or even I want to work out to feel less stressed. All are valid measures of fitness because fitness is both mental and physical, you just have to have goals set, so that you can make sure you are on track and keep motivated.
People make resolutions and set goals all the time, in fact, I bet you can’t list one person, who is not already fit, who mentioned wanting to lose weight or get in better shape. I can’t tell you how many times I have heard, “I so need to start going to the gym, I need to loose weight, I wish I could build some muscle… and the list goes on and on.”
Many times people set goals, many times they start programs, many times they succeed, and yet, so many people never get started and many more never reach their goals.
If you have ever wondered why so many resolutions fail, then I encourage you to stay with me, as we look at some common thought traps that can detour even the most enthusiastic intentions:
1) “Wishy washy wishes”
2) “It’s all or nothing baby!”
3) “I am on a diet”
4) “I want it all… and I want it now!!!”
5) “The BUTT Trap”
6) “Scales LIE!!!!”
Staying out of the heat help more than just your skin!
Staying out of the heat helps to fight fatigue. If you feel drained and tired all the time, take a quick look and examine your exposure to the sun.
Ladies, I already know… trying to attain the “Perfect Hour-Glass” can be even more difficult than Goldilocks trying to find a bed… The boobs are too small… the waste is too big… and the bottom, just never looks right.
The desire to expand to fit the top curve of the hour-glass is reflected in all of the ever-popular plumping strategies you can buy… boobs in a box, push-up bras, and saline and silicone stuffing surgeries, just to name a few.
The bottom curve may be the most controversial… some ladies love their curves… others would be happy with no hips at all. However, while in a way, “thin is in”… trust me when I tell you… the booty is back.
If you don’t believe me, think about this… at one time, you either had it or you didn’t, but now you can BUY A BOOTY. You can go for the quick fix and complement your WonderBra with something like “Wonder-wear” (underwear, with booty included). Don’t want to take your booty off at the end of the day, you can go back to the plastic surgeon, and get a two-for-one on saline and plump your rump to match the boobs you already bought.
So you’ve paid the price for filling out the top and bottom, but to really create the curves, you need contrast… so to cinch in your waste, you pay for your poison. You can either hold it in with restrictive wear, like: control tops, corsets, and girdles, oh my… or you have it taken away, with a nip and a tuck or even a suck, liposuction that is.
Trust me, get too caught up in the pursuit of the hour-glass by this definition and you will pay a lot of money, to end up temporarily padded out and pulled in or surgically filled up in some areas and sucked out in others.
However, there is a better way, instead of trying to buy an hourglass figure, why not build one through working out instead? In truth, the goal of the hourglass is to make the waist look small when compared to your other curves, so ultimately you want to reduce bodyfat overall and build muscle in strategic places.
The keys to building your hour-glass:
1) Reduce body-fat which will decrease the size of your waste
2) Develop your shoulders, especially your medial delts, with exercises like lateral raises, 3) Build your booty with exercises like squats, lunges, and dead-lifts
4) Replace your control top panty hose by tightening up your tummy. Focus in on your upper and lower abs with exercises like crunches and leg raises… don’t spend too much time on the sides (oblique muscles) because this can make some people look blocky.
Trust me when I tell you, this is an hour-glass you can achieve… and then the WonderBra will be a bonus to an already bangin’ body!
